We Cannot See

I was about to say that you would not BELIEVE how much I’ve been struggling but then I remembered you’ve probably seen some of my meet results.

But regardless of the performances I’ve been producing in competition I do do work.

Both on and off the track.

And I was thinking about all of this when I landed back in Atlanta the other day after a whirlwind trip to Houston for the All-Comers meet, and then from there to Washington D.C. for my younger sister’s art show.

The skies opened up as we pulled to the gate.

I made my way to baggage claim and gathered my (always way too much) luggage, and set out on a trek to relocate the car.

The leaky parking garage ceiling gave way to spontaneous waterfalls that soaked me and my bags as I made my way from the hourly lot to the daily one.

I started thinking about the Chronicles of Narnia, and its most popular installment, “The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe” which morphed into me thinking about how most people don’t know that there are seven novels that make up the Chronicles, and that “The Lion the Witch and The Wardrobe” isn’t even the best one.

(But that’s just my opinion)

Anyway, in a subsequent novel, Voyage of the Dawn Treader I think it was- Aslan (the Lion) tells them that they never enter Narnia the same way twice.

And for some reason that line, and that deep voice of Aslan the lion saying this to the kids was the voice I heard when I thought about my path to the car through the parking lot, and my two journeys to the 2012 and 2016 Olympic Games. And how different they were from each other.

It never happens the same way twice.

Now I’m at the car.

I’ve manhandled my luggage into the trunk, threw my backpack on the passenger’s seat.

I sit down, locate the credit card I’d used to get into the lot so that I can exit the same way, and make my way out into the storm.

But by the time I passed the last “Airport Exit” sign the storm had cleared.

My window was still down and I could smell the scent that rain leaves imprinted in the atmosphere after its departure and feel the heaviness of the humidity in my nostrils.

I let my hand linger outside the window, making waves like I used to do as a kid enjoying how the breeze felt on my skin.

And there it was.

A rainbow.

A double rainbow at that.

Part of me was reminded of the Bible story: Noah’s Ark and how the rainbow was said to represent the promise God made to never destroy the earth by water again.


The scientist in me snorted.

And I immediately began to ponder light, and how we are so mesmerized by rainbows.

Which are nothing more than the reflection, refraction, and dispersion of light in the remaining water molecules that act as prisms.

And we marvel at it.

And the color it produces.

Because we can see it.

Because it’s VISIBLE to us.

But that rainbow, those colors, that image represents just .0035% of all the light that exists.

Can you believe that!? The light we see, the colors we see only represent .0035% of the light that actually exists around us.

But we humans, aren’t always the best at appreciating the things we can’t see.

Are we?

Some of us even belittle, pity, and laugh at people of faith, wondering how they could stake so much on a belief system, a deity, that no one can prove actually exists.

After all seeing is believing...right?

Yogi’s believe that our true selves are best defined as this inner light of awareness.

As if the true you, your highest self, was buried deep down within you- as untouched by the bullshit of human life as a candle in a cavern with no breeze...

The flame, burning steadily, never flickering.

I’m on I-85 south now, thinking about light.

And how much of it there actually is, and how little of it we can actually see.

And yet...

We are fully aware of its existence.

Fully confident in it’s importance, and necessity, to our lives here on earth.

And yet...

We don’t see ourselves in that same light (pun intended)

There’s only so much...

Only a small percentage of our path we can see...

And we make so many judgements about what it all means based on the .0035% of it that’s visible to us.

And it’s not even about faith.

The light you cannot see is REAL.

It can be detected and measured.

The things you cannot see working in your life are REAL.

Your action or inaction produces real, detectable, and measurable results.

You can’t see it now...

But you will.

Open your eyes.

It may not happen for you the way that it’s happened before. Odds are it won’t. You’re not the same, the conditions aren’t the same.

Nothing is the same.

One thing is certain. One thing hasn’t changed: you aren’t seeing the whole picture.

But that doesn’t make the picture any less real.

Believe in the picture of your life.

Even if it’s bathed in all the light you cannot see.